DONUT JUSTICE: Mojo Monkey, West 7th, St. Paul

About a week ago I said BRAT JUSTICE was the rarest type of FOOD JUSTICE.  I take that back: DONUT JUSTICE is clearly the least common.  What is worse than donuts?  They're bad for you, they're made from horrible artificial things, and they're usually sold in gas stations, which are universally evil.  Eating a donut is like sticking your hand in boiling water: it looks fun, it's kind of exciting while it's happening, but it's immediately painful and regrettable.  There is nothing worse in the world than the way your mouth feels after eating a donut, except maybe the way your stomach feels.  I hate donuts.  How can a donut shop possibly be worthy of being mentioned in the same sentence as FOOD JUSTICE?  Mojo Monkey in St. Paul makes it possible!

It takes a lot for me to get over my hatred of monkeys, but despite its terrifying name, I have nothing but praise for Mojo Monkey Donuts (Cathedral Hill's Cheeky Monkey, on the other hand, will never earn such redemption).  Mojo bakes in-house, uses organic ingredient, serves organic fair-trade coffee, and sells TeaSource tea.  What more could you want?  By the time I got in they were sold out of their already famous Mango Glaze Coconut, but the S'more with sweet Graham crumble and the Mocha Mouse Bismark with coffee-flavored filling were hands down the best donuts I've ever had.  Every bite was rich without being cloying, and I didn't even feel ill after eating two.  I can't wait to go back and try more of their many options, which include Red Velvet, Keylime, and something with an entire strip of bacon on it.  This takes donut-eating to a whole new level.  New York has Doughnut Plant, Portland has Voodoo, but none of them can touch St. Paul's Mojo.  Maybe monkeys deserve another chance.

 Mojo Monkey Donuts is located at 1169 W 7th St., St. Paul.